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Stargate Universe Drops into a Black Hole

Being a long time fan of the Stargate saga, I found myself looking forward to their latest series, Stargate Universe all summer. The advanced previews looked visually stunning and the underlying concept was definitely intriguing - kind of Star Trek Voyager meets Stargate Atlantis. I recognized at least two fairly talented actors prominently positioned in these trailers, so I was thinking that perhaps the Stargate producers were going to take the brand to the next level. I still recall the first Stargate series fondly, which I think was probably the best one and was initially very pleased by how things were shaping up in the evolution of the overall saga plot line. So, I was all geared up and ready to go and get into this new televised adventure as Stargate was positioned to leave the galaxy and go where no wormhole had gone before.

The trouble began though with episode one of Stargate universe. There was a sort of darkness pervading both the characters and the cinematography of the premier. We soon discovered that the darkness became bleaker as the series progressed. And I'm not just speaking metaphorically here, the sets were actually dark; the characters were brooding, melancholy and miserable. Worst of all the, the plot lines as they began developing seemed unnaturally full of despair. As each episode passed, I became increasingly depressed and began to parallel the feelings of the characters on screen. Most of the characters on Stargate Universe are unhappy and miserable with one another. After only four episodes I began openly rooting for whatever disaster might present itself to help wipe out the crew. If only the ship would explode, if only the mysterious little alien monsters that they found we just finished them off, if only they would all just kill each other and get it over with. I don't believe I've ever watched a show before of any genre which had no characters at all with any redeeming values whatsoever. Stargate Universe is that show.


Send this show to the end of the Universe and please keep it there...

I started to become frightened that rooting for the demise of everyone on the show that I was watching might be considered somewhat psychologically disturbing, so I had to give up watching the show altogether after about six episodes. By that time however, I was confident in my prediction that none of the characters would become any more likable and that none of the plot lines would become any more interesting between that point and the end of season one. So the question I'm asking myself now, is how is it possible to create a show with no redeeming characteristics whatsoever? What were these folks thinking when they put this concept together?

Were these folks trying to put together another edgy science-fiction saga like BattleStar Galactica? In BattleStar there were few characters that weren't entirely likable (well maybe about 4), there were some dark sets and it also had an over-arching sense of doom hanging over everyone - yet in BattleStar there were a number of redeeming qualities as well. More importantly, there were a number of very well-defined characters who were clearly identified in the series premiere who we could follow throughout the course of the series. We had Capt. Adama, his son Apollo, Starbuck and even the bad guy was kind of interesting and those Cylons, wow that was interesting. All of those folks on Battlestar evolved throughout the series and even in the early episodes. The only character growth that’s occurred so far on Stargate Universe is that all of the characters got creepier.

When in doubt blame the writers; that’s what I always say. The writing team for Stargate Universe obviously jumped headfirst into a creative black hole. The plot lines were confused from day one, the motivations and behaviors all the characters seem wildly inappropriate and despite there being obvious talent amongst the actors they chose the main characters aren't given any likable traits whatsoever. For viewers to invest their time in a multi year series, there's got to be something for us and it. And what we’re looking for above everything else is a premise and a story that both entertains and inspires us. Unfortunately, Stargate Universe merely insulted our intelligence, especially when using the ridiculous "communication stones" gimmick which defies all scientific laws and seems to serve only as a plot crutch when they can't think of anything to do on that boring ship.

I tend to think that this latest installment in the Stargate saga will not destroy the brand and that like Star Trek’s rebounds it will be able to come back from this failure. However, Stargate Universe took a wrong turn when it left the galaxy and many of us hope that the series keeps flying away towards the edge of the universe at the highest possible velocity.


Copyright 2009, Raving Reviews

The Indomitable Johnny Drama

Every decade or so, Hollywood produces a truly remarkable character actor or character; someone that embodies the soul of the Everyman. An Everyman is an archetype, a conglomeration of all those characteristics we tend to see in ourselves. And in Everyman is not a celebrity, not a star and probably not even the greatest success, but the Everyman has depth.

I started watching Entourage in earnest for the first time this Summer. I may have seen it once or twice before while traveling, stuck in some hotel with nothing but HBO to watch - Entourage though requires multiple episodes to fully appreciate. I found myself becoming addicted to the series over the past few months now that I have HBO again at home and they are showing the entire series 12 episodes at a time on Saturday nights. While the main characters are likable enough, the show truly works as an entourage - in other words as an ensemble cast. The inside glimpses into how business gets done in Hollywood is another fascinating aspect of the show.

What really drew me into Entourage however was the character of Johnny Chase. At first his character seemed a bit like "cheap laughs," the butt for many jokes and perhaps an almost stereotypical comic foil. On the show Johnny Chase is known by his nickname Johnny Drama, the older brother of an up-and-coming movie star Vincent Chase. In a fascinating parallel between Hollywood fiction in Hollywood reality the character of Johnny Chase is played by actor Kevin Dillon who himself is the actor brother of what was once a major Hollywood movie star, Matt Dillon. Perhaps because of his background, Dillon is able to channel Johnny Drama’s character in a way that no other actor could. Dylan has impeccable comedic timing but also a definite flair for the dramatic living up to the name Johnny Drama more often than one might expect.


Occasionally thing do go Johnny's way...

So what is it that draws us to Johnny Drama instead of perhaps the show's star, Vincent Chase portrayed by Adrian Grenier? The character of Johnny Drama character is funny consistently across every episode, but as we watch the humor isn't always that funny or is funny at his expense. Most of what happens to Johnny drama is the result of his various flaws. This is why he's never quite made it in Hollywood despite being there much longer than his younger brother. He definitely has talent, but things don't always go his way and he has trouble coping with that. No matter what happens to him though, Johnny Drama never gives up on his dreams. In this he is like the rest of us, we can see that success just a little bit beyond our reach and we keep trying to get to it but never quite make it. Even though we never do achieve all the things that we dream of, the pursuit of those dreams is what defines us and our self-deprecating humor is what makes us human.

After a while it becomes hard not to root for Johnny drama. Perhaps if he can make it we can make it and even if we don't we can have some fun along the way. Entourage is definitely an adult show, something children and even young teens probably shouldn't watch, but for the older crowd entourage gives us clever plot lines and strong believable characters. At times their little Hollywood world seems perfectly real as each episode interjects a flurry of cameos from Hollywood insiders and faces from the news and prime time TV. Johnny Drama is a likable average Joe, much more likable than Joe the Plumber though, he is TV's everyman.


Copyright 2009, Raving Reviews

The Raving Reviews Taxonomy

Here at Raving Reviews we intend to write our reviews little differently. This site is not only dedicated to critiquing reviewing and rating movies it is also an outlet for cultural observation and humor. To give you an idea of what type of material you'll be seeing here will present a short guide or review taxonomy:
  • Article category one - a rave: A Rave is not a particularly focused critique, instead it is a general expression of appreciation.
  • Article category two - a riff: A Riff is not a critique at all but rather an opportunity to lampoon a truly bad piece of cinema or television. It is also an hommage to the comedic geniuses from Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Riff Trax and Cinematic Titanic.
  • Article category three - a rant: A Rant is exactly what it sounds like, a rambling diatribe directed at anyone or anything that may be poignant, hilarious or just completely stupid.
  • Article category four - a culturePop: A culture pop is a satirical or whimsical examination of some event or trend associated with popular culture.
  • Article category five - a review: a review is the traditional form of cinematic or television critique. While we don't particularly put much stock into rating systems, we will share our opinions and make viewing recommendations.
  • Article category six - a wax: this represents those times when we choose to wax philosophic about society, culture and the general downfall of mankind.
  • Article category seven - a rage: this category represents the rare occasions when we become inexplicably outraged over some relatively trivial issue.
As we transition from the Raving Reviews Blog to the Raving Reviews online magazine we will expand this taxonomy and apply it to a wide spectrum of media and culture related categories.



Copyright 2009, Raving Reviews

Bond Movie Titles

It's been a while since I've seen a good James Bond film. I heard somewhere that there is another one coming out soon, although I'm not altogether sure about that. The last one, Quantum of Solace wasn't fulfilling as far as Bond movies go. But 007 movies have always been kind of hit or miss; there have been quite a few different actors directors and producers involved over the years and not every combination works out right. I just looked it up on the web and it seems as though the next Bond movie is simply being referred to as Bond 23 because it is the 23rd movie in the series. The movie isn't due out until sometime in 2011, but even still it seems somehow depressing that there is no title associated with it yet. So I decided to go through a Bond title brainstorming session and I came up with the following tentative titles for our next Bond extravaganza:

1 - "Tomorrow Never Fries" the story of James Bond's struggle to reduce cholesterol levels through dietary and lifestyle changes.

2 - "Don't Never Say Never" the seldom heard story about James Bond's Summer school experience in a remedial grammar class.

3 - "Twilight's Last Gleaming" James Bond's resentment towards Twilight fans boils over in this nonstop action thriller.

4 - "Screwed Royale" The little heard story of James Bond’s experience investing his retirement funds with Bernie Madoff.

5 - "Dr., No More" and evil tale of James Bond ‘s most recent visit to the urologist.

6 - "Aluminum Finger" James Bond can't find a Halloween costume and decides to dress up as a robot by covering himself in Reynolds Wrap.

7 -"Leaf Raker" James Bond hires a sinister teenager to clean up his yard but instead of getting his leaves raked the punk takes the five dollars and TP's 007's backyard.

8 - "Quantum of Salad" As part of James Bond's new low-cholesterol diet he buys the salad shooter and things go horribly wrong.

9 - "My Bullets Never Lie" James Bond takes antidepressant medication which makes him a bit paranoid and he begins to question the loyalty of his Walther PP K.

10 - "Crap Always Floats" James Bond gets philosophical.



Bond Themes are often better than the movies, but the titles are the best part...


11 - "Blogging Is Forever" James Bond discovers Web 2.O.

12 - "Tweets Never Die" James Bond gets into twitter battle with Chad Ocho Cinco.

13 - "License to Sell Real Estate" James Bond moonlights in the residential real estate market only to see it crash and his hopes and dreams ruined. A vengeful Bond then goes after predatory lenders and exacts revenge.

14 - "A View to Your Neighbor's Pool" James Bond gets caught putting a WebCam on the outside of his house so that he can spy on the house next door.

15 - "Pink Eye" The really disgusting tale of how James Bond infected his left eye after picking his nose and sticking his fingers in it.

16 - "My Credit Cards Are Not Enough" A cautionary tale of when James Bond gets laid off, maxes out his cards and ends up having to cancel his cable TV.

17 - "Live and Let Fry" James Bond falls off the wagon, ditches his low cholesterol diet and hits the skids at McDonald's with supersized fries three times a day.

18 - "The Spy Who Dissed Me" After his credit cards are maxed out, James Bond gets tossed out of Best Buy when he can't pay the geek squad and insults them for not removing the adware from his laptop.

19 - "Diamonds Are Really Sparkly" James Bond lowers his standards a bit and begins dating Britney Spears.

20. - "Live and Let Exterminate" Sarah Palin fails to stop Obama's death panels leaving James Bond as the only possible savior for America's elderly.

There are so many possibilities for good title for the next Bond movie...


Copyright 2009, Ravings Reviews

Watching "Up" Brought Me Down

Well, I finally got around to buying a DVD of the Disney movie “up.” It certainly wasn't what I was expecting. In fact, I guess you could say there's something to depress every age group and this film. The movie starts off well enough, with the story of a boy and a girl he meets who both share a sense of adventure. At this stage of the movie, things are pretty optimistic. It seems as though we've entered the beginning of some magical adventure which may lead our two main characters to some lost faraway exotic location in search of their childhood hero. That hero is an explorer who travels to deepest darkest South America in a magnificent dirigible seeking to find the rarest of all creatures.

Very quickly, we begin to discover that things aren’t going to go as expected. Time passes and our protagonists begin to age very quickly. Before we know it, the story that we expected seems as though it can never occur because the two main characters become senior citizens in the first 10 minutes of the movie. As if that wasn't bad enough, every time it seems as though they might have had a chance for adventure they have to raid the piggy bank for funds and never seem to have the money to realize their dream. Then of course one of the two protagonists now a wife an old woman, dies. Once she's gone, we realize the idyllic home and environment that they had been living in is now surrounded by an urban jungle. Evil developers wearing ‘men in black’ shades are trying to tear down the home where there was at least some happiness if not any adventure.



10 foot tall Blue Birds and Talking Dogs couldn't save this movie

The main character in the movie is portrayed by Ed Asner, who must be at least as old as the character he was playing on film. At this stage in his life, the main character has lost his wife, had zero adventures and has become a bit of a curmudgeon. Ed Asner has always been adept at playing curmudgeons, even when he wasn't very old. Once I realized who the actor was supplying the voice for the animated character, I couldn't get the image out of my mind of the character he played in “JFK.” I was expecting the animated old curmudgeon to start drinking and talking about Operation Mongoose and then pistol whip the other characters. I think that would have been more interesting than the plot line that was actually followed.

Without giving too much away, the curmudgeon and a stowaway Boy Scout escape the urban jungle utilizing homegrown dirigible technology (shades of Balloon Boy) and head to that faraway fantasy adventure land known as Venezuela. The animators apparently spent an incredible amount of time and effort to accurately recreate the environment in Venezuela where the actual adventure finally takes place. It all centers around a place called Angel falls. And of course I know all about it now because I watched the special feature that came with the DVD showing how all the animators and filmmakers trekked around the jungles near Angel falls so that they could become inspired by the natural landscape and incorporate that realism into their animations. The one thought that kept going through my head though while I was watching that, was that once they had visited the place they would likely be a few of the only several hundred people on the planet who actually knew what the place looked like. So it begs the question, why the big focus on accuracy in depicting Angel falls, and why the relative lack of focus on the plot line?

As an animation production, the film is technically very rich and generally pleasant to watch. However the hallmark of many recent Disney and Pixar films has not been the excellent animation per se, it's been the ever-improving storylines associated with animated movies. Aspects of this movie's plot seemed disjointed, hard to follow and not particularly appealing. The plot line revolving the movie's villain who at one point was the movie's hero is particularly confusing and disappointing. Populating the movie with talking dogs didn't seem to further the plot line any and made me wonder whether or not somebody had pitched this as pandering recognition to an audience primarily populated by children who might find talking dogs cool.

All in all, I wouldn't recommend this DVD. The conclusion of the movie wasn't particularly satisfying and for all you women out there the only real female character got killed off in the first 15 minutes, so no matter what happened afterwards the movie remains depressing from that perspective. The one thing I'm inspired to do after watching this film is to make sure I go out and live my life a little more before all the people I love are dead and I'm an invalid.


Copyright 2009, Raving Reviews™ .