Joining the "Community"

It was a dull Thursday evening in the summer of '10, and I was flipping the channels late at night when I suddenly came across an interesting show on NBC. DirectTV said it was something called Community, about a lawyer who has to go back to college... Community College that is. We breeze through a very "Breakfeast Club" like pilot that brings together the study group (of main actors) which includes Jeff Winger (Joel McHale), the cool lawyer (who has his state bar license revoked at the series, Britta Perry (Gillian Jacobs) a young, very straightforward woman who seems to be the most knowledgeable on issues affecting the world today. Abed Nadir (Danny Pudi) is a Palestinian student with a very bizarre personality, often referencing pop culture in quite nearly every situation and blurring the lines between TV shows, movies, and reality. Shirley Bennett (Yvette Nicole Brown) is a single mother who is recently divorced, and the most religious member of the group. Annie Edison (Alison Brie) is a young recent high school dropout due to a bizarre psychological breakdown, though she is normally quite calm, cheerful, and the most responsible member of the group. Troy Barnes (Donald Glover) is the jock of the group, and was a football star at the high school he attended before being forced to drop out, and losing his football scholarship. Then there's Pierce Hawthorne (Chevy Chase) and Ben Chang (Ken Jeong), the first being a moist towelette tycoon and the latter being the somewhat insane Spanish teacher.

The first season focuses primarily on the various trials and tribulations of the self proclaimed "Spanish" study group, from introductions to the different classes that the group is taking (such as Spanish 101 with Senor Chang, or Anthropology 101) or some of the strange or bizarre projects that the members have been assigned, or taken upon themselves to do.

The best part of season one is the large amount of pure laugh out loud moments that are captured at least once or twice in each episode. Especially at the very end of the episode, when they have one or two minute "mini-sodes" usually involving Troy and Abed. Speaking of which, here are a few season one Community clips for your enjoyment!

Now we know why Senor Chang teaches Spanish... right?

An amusing little remix of several Senor Chang moments from Season One.

Troy and Abed's most famous rap.

For endless bliss, hit the left arrow on your keyboard over and over once the video ends.

Be on the lookout for another review coming soon from me, possibly on NBC's other hit show, Outsourced!

Copyright 2011, J. Michael

Read More

Bond 23 Exclusive - The Hunt for Rogue November

We had planned on dedicating an entire post to Nicolas Cage's hair, but we decided to wait until we saw his new release, Season of the Witch (the latest attempt to pay his back taxes). We're not sure who exactly plays the witch, but the crusader backdrop to the movie looks somewhat intriguing.

Warning - spoilers ahead...

The other reason we've delayed our critical analysis of Nick Cage's hair is that we've gotten our hands on a treasure trove of exclusive information on the new James Bond film. Bond 23 as it was titled previously, had suspended production last year when MGM went bankrupt. The movie is now finally gearing up again and looks to be ready for a release sometime in 2012. The timing of the release must have played a major role in the new direction the movie is taking.

The Bond 23 production now has a tentative title - "The Hunt for Rogue November."

Plot Synopsis - The premise is this; in a fiercely contested presidential race, MILF candidate Sarah Palin is targeted by an insanely jealous former lover and Russian leader (Vladamir Putin) who attempts to kidnap her and hold her for ransom in his Siberian love-nest. The fiesty former half-governor who doesn't trust Obama's hand-chosen security detail led by Felix Leiter looks to England for a conservative bodyguard she can really trust - who turns out to be Margaret Thatcher's and Prince Charles' little known love-child, James Bond.

At first the two don't get along at all, as London Calling clashes with Wild Alaska - the sparks fly, but soon those sparks become glowing embers of passion. It is an action-packed thriller where the lady being guarded has bigger guns than her protector and James finds himself torn between Queen, Country and the lady in red who has stolen his heart. The Villains in this film will stop at nothing to remove her from the political equation as we are transported to exotic locales like Kenya, Hawaii and Indonesia. The evil Doctora Ariana Huffington makes her premier appearance as she conspires with Putin to trash Palin's Facebook page.

Photo Credit - J. Michael: When it's cold they get hot...

Alternative Titles - There were a number of options for the working title; some that we're seriously considered but rejected include:

• "Ice Melts when it's Hot."
• "Bear on the Horizon."
• "Dancing with the Czars."
• "Fully Automatic & Lovely"
• "The MILF Who Loved Me."
• "A View to Russia (from my porch)."
• "Muckraker."
• "You can Only Serve 2 Terms."

Scene Stealing Quotes - We also got a hold of the script and can share with you some of the best lines from the movie. Here they are:

Palin on Putin:

• "James, he doesn't take NYET for an answer."
• In a scene where someone asks whether Putin would go so far as to commit his nuclear forces to get his way - "He certainly knew how to push my buttons."
• "Detente is a four letter word, right?"
• "He's one Polar Bear who doesn't give a shit about Global Warming."

Putin on Palin:

• "She is my Wild Alaska."
• "She put the 'stroik' in Perestroika."
• "If I cannot have her, the American Public certainly will not."
• "She is the Arctic fox to my Russian bear."
• "We will Putin her on ice."
• "I love a woman in red."
  

Palin to Bond:

• "You're serious, I always thought Thatcher was a man?" when confronted with the secret about James' heritage.
  
• "You'll always be my top gun, Maverick."
• "I AM your Witch, baby."
• "Can you take out Katy, I mean what use is that stupid license if you never use it?"
• "When I said all night, I meant 6 months, this is Alaska."
• "Let's have a Tea Party at my place."
• "I may be a half governor, but I'm a whole woman."
  

Bond to Palin:

• "I like my Tea hot, steamy and full of sugar."
• "You remind a lot of mum, except for the glasses."
• "Tweet me if you want to live."
• "We fired Q and now shop entirely at the Sharper Image."
• "I don't understand Hockey, but I love to puck."
  

Evil Villain Quotes:

• Dr. Ariana: "We will stop her from testing cosmetics on farm animals for good."
• Obama: "Sarah and Vladamir deserve each other, I'm just the matchmaker."
• Felix: "Oprah made me do it."
• Pelosi: "Damn her hair!"
• Putin: "Siberia is for Lovers."
• Obama: "ObamaCare, hah, Obama don't care."
  

Gratuitous gloating after the Demise of various Generic Henchmen:

• "He had a bad hair day." Palin upon seeing a henchman losing the top of his head in an elaborate saw trap originally meant for James.
  
• "It's more fun when they can't shoot back." Palin comparing shooting moose & bad guys.
  
• "I think he just dropped in the polls." Bond after a henchman plummets from a rugged Alaskan peak.
  
• "He had a Lead Deficit" Bond after shooting a henchman about 20 times.
  
• "That was an electrifying speech." Bond after tossing a microphone with an exposed wire to a henchman standing next to a podium in a puddle of water.
  
• "Drill, Baby Drill" - Palin after a Henchman falls down an oil well.
• "Now, that's a Death Panel." - Bond after being chased in a hospital by henchmen disguised as health care workers, uses faulty Medicaid equipment to blow up five of them in a conference room.
• "Filibuster this!" Sarah punches her way out of a Senate subcommittee filled with henchmen disguised as Congressional Aides.
  

We are close to obtaining an exclusive video with actual scenes from the movie - which you will only see here. Stayed Tuned...


Copyright 2010, Raving Reviews

Read More

The Top 6 Star Trek Fan Videos

Hey there, Mike again with a new type of post here at Raving Reviews. Today we'll be looking at six fantastically (and some of them, how hilariously) made Star Trek fan videos that we at Raving Reviews have found. So without further ado, I give you our first video, the most popular fan tribute to the show in existence.

• Star Trek: 40th Anniversary Fan Tribute by ENTERPRISE-NX01- The video uses a orchestral piece performed in an episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation and uses footage from every series and quite nearly every movie in the franchise excluding the recent reboot.

A wonderful, orchestral tribute to the show that flows beautifully.

• Captain Kirk's Court Martial By TheBadPandaVideoBlog - An interesting collection of almost every "redshirt" death in the original Star Trek series. To a cheery soundtrack as well!

"Are you casting me... in the role of the devil?" -Captain Kirk

• Star Trek: Confusion by College Humor- A completely confused parody that's not far off from the actual movie, enjoy the random nerdbabble.

Due to technical difficulties, you'll have to view it through this link, sorry!


Ewoks, Excalibur, Stormtroopers? This is all far too confusing for me...

• Star Trek: How It Should Have Ended by HISHE- Our curious friends over at HISHE have struck gold with this great "alternate ending" to the new Star Trek movie, take a look!

Lens flare generators... can't get enough of 'em.

• Star Trek: DS9 Crew Views Star Trek XI Trailer by GeneralGrin- Okay, so this funny edit of a DS9 scene may rip the new movie a little, but seeing as its "Grin" material, and we didn't like the movie as much as others, we enjoyed it!

Apparently Captain Picard wasn't too happy with the new Star Trek movie...

• TNG Recut #3-Mr. Woof by GeneralGrin- The General has posted quite a few of this short edits of TNG episodes, we thought you might enjoy this one.

Pressing the wrong buttons can have dangerous results...

• Hitler Reacts to the new Star Trek Movie by Ottervomit- Yes yes... another Downfall parody, and we know it jeers at the new movie, but its funny, just watch it (but beware, as with most of the Downfall parodies, there may be some language inappropriate for the kiddies)

My next post is going to be on the first season of NBC's hit show Community!

Copyright 2010, Michael J.

Read More

Centurion Mugs Gladiator, Film at 11

Our holiday was quite enjoyable - even more so considering that one of our presents was a new Netflix subscription. Now we've still got our DirectTV subscription but we finally have true Video on Demand - after only twenty five years of waiting !

We celebrated this remarkable and earth-shattering event by watching several newer releases last night including last year's Centurion. We must admit that one of the reasons we chose it was due to the action-packed trailer which reminded us a bit of the first sequence in 1999's Gladiator with Russell "I'm not Mel Gibson" Crowe.

The best position for receiving an ambush is to
stay right in the middle of a sunken road

Little did we know how far those similarities would extend. Calling this movie a rip off isn't fair to most rip-offs, it was almost a clone. Let's examine this movie's genetic structure and compare it to Gladiator:

• Both films begin in the cold barbarian north with a Roman Legion.
• Both films have a young-looking bearded general.
• Both films sport a fireball attack.
  
• Both films have a gladiator in it.
• Both films involve a roman being captured.
• Both films have token ethnic slaves / soldiers.
• Both films have lot's of head smashing and head severing.

Now there are some important differences, including:

• The tongueless she devil tracker babe in Centurion.
• The father-son bonding issues in Gladiator.
• The cross-country Braveheart style Highland running in Centurion.
• Actual gladiatorial combat in Gladiator (as opposed to arm-wrestling in Centurion).
• A Scottish Witch (if you don't count Maximus' scar-faced assistant).
• The Butch & Sundance ripoff cliff-dive in Centurion.
• The 300-esque computer animated blood splashes in Centurion.
  

In fact, the romans and pagans battling in Centurion seemed so eager to bleed that the red stuff was spewing a split second before they were cut, slashed, gouged, skewered (and yes some folks got skewered) and hacked. It was a bloody mess, literally but then so was the script, the premise, the outcome and all of the characters and their lame acting. The bleeders and decapitated corpses provided the most convincing performances. After you're done with this one you'll be looking for a transfusion and making sure never to travel to Northern England (which appears much like the North Pole in this flik).

Are you not entertained ?, We'll no, not really, we're not
- but the metal middle finger is a nice touch.

Yes, we know we said we were going to do a worst hairstyles in Hollywood post, but in our extensive research we've realized that one actor, Nicolas Cage, owns nearly half of the sum total of Hollywood bad hair. So our bad hair post will be dedicated to a man whose taste knows no bounds (a better premise for the movie Knowing than the one in that awful film).

Copyright 2010, Raving Reviews

Read More

Top 10 Movies of 2010 We Wish We Hadn't Seen

We're not sure if these are the absolute worst movies of the year, but they do represent the worst ones we had to suffer through personally. When it gets closer to Oscar time we will do some more research and provide a more accurate Worst of 2010 list. But for now - here's the losers from last year...

• The Book of Eli - We watched this on a flight, we can't be sure if it was the altitude or the awful airline food but we got nauseous during this one. The plot was as bizarre as it was simplistic (basically it all revolved around one punchline), the acting was post apocalyptic, the scenery was dreary and depressing. All in all this movie had little going for it. Denzel Washington also seemed hopelessly miscast and out of place in his lead role. This movie rated a big "Yuk" (and not a funny yuk either).

• Extraordinary Measures - Harrison Ford proved definitively with this movie that he can play a complete jerk with zero redeeming qualities. The story was supposed to inspire us we guess, but we're not quite sure because by the halfway mark we just wanted to throw Indiana Jones into the snakepit.

• Edge of Darkness - OK, we admit we didn't actually watch this one, but it was a movie about Mel Gibson acting crazy and mean and we already saw his antics on Youtube and other places so we figured how different can it be? Just say no to Mad Mel...

• Percy Jackson & The Lightning Thief - We suppose there is some value seeing Pierce Brosnan CG'd on top of a horse's ass, but beyond that this movie was fairly tedious. Granted it was supposed to be a kid's film but it just didn't have any magic to it even with the over the top special effects.
  

• The City of Your Final Destination - One good rule of thumb about movies might be that if you find the title incomprehensible it is likely that the movie may follow suit - that certainly turned out to be the case with this ridiculous Merchant Ivory flick. Luckily we caught this on DirectTV instead of the theater and saved ourselves about twenty bucks. By the end of the movie we didn't know what had happened and we didn't really care either.

• Boogie Woogie - Another rule of thumb about movie prediction is if the movie title just sounds stupid, the movie is likely to be stupid. This movie conclusively proves the point - there basically is no plot and what does appear on the screen is disjointed and mainly unpleasant. We're treated to the worst English accent in the history of Cinema from Gillian Anderson (where's Mulder when you need him), the worst gift idea ever (we cannot even begin to describe it), and the worst whining, suicidal gay rant ever. Oh, let's not forget the many knowing glances and evil hearty laughter between the rich sinister art dealers and collectors. Film as modern art is a bit hard to take - but then again so is any modern art.
  

• Robin Hood - This was without a doubt our biggest disappointment of the year; Ridley Scott, Russell Crowe and the easiest story ever - and they blew it. Seriously, how can you screw up Robin Hood? Well, if you really want to know watch this version.

• Prince of Persia - For the second worst English accent ever, check out Jake Gyllenhaal's performance in the video game inspired, insipid and downright stupid PoP. Did we say we didn't like this movie? OK, first of all why the hell do people living in ancient Persia need to speak with pompous British accents (and doing it in such a way as to insult pompous Brits everywhere)? Second, didn't they know how to shave back then and if they did were they using the Don Johnson razor stubble specials that Jake seemed to have found? And what is with the hair? Did anyone in ancient Persia go around looking that stupid? You may think we're ignoring the plot here - well, guess what there wasn't one so we're justified in focusing on the parts of the movie which will scar us forever.
  

• Knight & Day - This one should have been titled, Botox & Facelift. Are we the only ones who have noticed that Tom Cruise & Cameron Diaz seem to be unable to accept how old they are? This movie was a sad attempt to recapture lost youth and like all such attempts ends up embarrassing the folks searching for their lost youth and making the audience feel unconformable. The script is preposterous and dull at the same time (a remarkable feat) and the action scenes were all off. It's time for these two to embrace middle age.
  

• The Expendables - If ever there were an award for accuracy in movie titles - this movie would win it hands down. The whole movie is expendable, the plot is expendable, the characters are both reprehensible and expendable, the action is expendable - it was truly awful on a scale that defies description. In a previous post we noted how mental ward escapee Dolph Lungreen nearly killed Stallone while filming this monstrosity - why oh why couldn't he have killed the whole movie? If criminal penalties could be assessed to people who produce bad cinema everyone involved with this movie would be behind bars.
  

Stallone assaults his on crew during the filming of the Expendables before assaulting the American Public with one of the worst films of the year...

Our next post will be dedicated a more serious topic, to the Worst Hollywood / Celebrity hairstyles of all time...


Copyright 2010, Raving Reviews

Read More

Best Celebrity Quotes of 2010

Before we give you the top 10 movies we wished we hadn't seen we're going to dazzle you with the words of wisdom from Hollywood's most interesting and disturbing people. So without further adieu, here are the best celebrity quotes of 2010, enjoy:

• If Elton John and Madonna had a baby it would be Lady Gaga.
  - Jon Bon Jovi (the best observation of the year)

• Do I hope that those people die screaming of rectal cancer? Yeah. You know, but I'm not going to spend a lot of energy on it.
  - Sean Penn (we had forgotten how charming he can be).

• “Are you serious?” -- Lindsay Lohan's reaction to her jail sentence (duhhh)

• "Listen, everyone is entitled to my opinion." -- Madonna (no explanation necessary)

• "The internet's completely over. I don't see why I should give my new music to iTunes or anyone else. They won’t pay me an advance for it, and then they get angry when they can’t get it. All these computers and digital gadgets are no good. They just fill your head with numbers, and that can’t be good for you.” -- Prince (Purple Rain or Purple Haze???)

• “What would people most like to see in 3-D? Probably a naked lady.” -- HughHefner (you got to say one thing for him, he's consistent)

• "Hang on, everybody - I wanna try something I saw in a cartoon once!" from the A Team

• “I was told that Dolph had punched my rib cage into my chest, compressing my heart. If it had swollen any more, I would have died. After that, I was like, ‘Dolph, it’s only a movie, bro…’” –Sylvester Stallone on filming “The Expendables” with Dolph Lundgren (unfortunately for us, the movie was completed and released)

• "I don't know if this is too much for your magazine, but I can actually mentally give myself an orgasm." -- Lady Gaga (maybe it has something to do with the meat dress?)

• "We are requesting asylum from Hollywood star whackers." - Randy and Evi Quaid's lawyer reads out a statement during the couple's immigration hearing in Vancouver, B.C. (we intend to write a post soon entitled "Why Randy Quaid & his Wife are so Crazy.")

• "I actually choose the way I eat according to the way animals have sex."
  - Nicolas Cage says he'll only eat animals who are 'dignified' in their sexual pursuits. (and yes we're going to write a post called "Why is Nick Cage so Crazy and why doesn't he pay his taxes?")

• “I really hate vaginas. I’m allergic to vagina. But I can’t say I had no idea, because it was a 12-hour shoot, so you kind of get the picture that these women are going to stay naked after, like, five or six hours. But I wasn’t exactly prepared. I had no idea what to say to these girls. Thank God I was hung over.” —Robert Pattinson on his photo shoot with naked women (This was more insight than we ever hoped to glean from vampire boy - we are thinking of dedicating a post to the question, why doesn't Robert Pattison like Vaginas?).

• “I think parents need to beat the (expletive) outta their kids. I think the whole spanking thing and how it’s gotten all PC is for the birds. … (My dad) put me through a wall; it’s the only reason I’m still alive.” -- Pink (It's nice to see Hollywood embracing family values)

• “Everyone was so worried about who was going to want to see this movie. I remember them being like, ‘How do you get guys to a ballet movie? How do you get girls to a thriller?’ And the answer is a lesbian scene. Everyone wants to see that.” –Natalie Portman (the Empire is Dumbstruck).
  

• “Today’s ‘Sesame Street’ will not be brought to you by the number 34 or the letter D.” -- Russell Brand’s tweet in September over the controversy about his wife Katy Perry’s revealing outfit on “Sesame Street” (we are thinking of watching Sesame Street again)
  

We didn't say that they these quotes would be profound - c'mon it's Hollywood, what did you expect?


Copyright 2010, Raving Reviews

Read More

Top Movies of 2010 that We Missed - part 2

It's the New Year but we still have finished our lists, so here is part 2 of the Best Films of 2010 we haven't seen yet but want to...

• Vincere - (which means victory in English) This is an Italian film about Mussolini but with a personal twist. The cinematography looks fantastic and this seems to be far the best foreign movie trailer we've seen for 2010. Although the film is in Italian it looks to be fascinating and perhaps enlightening as well - most of us only know Mussolini as a clownish caricature but there must have been more to him to get as far as he did (even if he did turn out to be a bit of a jerk).
  

The secret true story about Mussolini's other wife & rise to power

• Hubble 3D - If there are two things we love - it's space and IMAX movies. Now it just so happens that your editors were present at the original launch of the Hubble Space telescope back in 1990. And guess what this was narrated by Leonardo Di Caprio, who as we've noted seemed to be in the midst of a number of the most interesting projects in Hollywood last year - so this documentary has everything going for it.
  

• Zonad - This movie looks as crazy as the title but for a comedy we figure that's a good thing. We've always believed that Ireland was a happier place than most contemporary movies portray it and perhaps this is the proof that we needed - and of course what could be funnier than Irish space aliens?
  

Take me to your nearest pub earthlings....

• Princess Kaiulani - This is a bio-epic about the heir to Hawaii's thrown right as the United States was moving to take over Hawaii at the end of the 19th century. It certainly appears to be a compelling story, shot in both Hawaii and England.
  

• The Best Worst Movie -A documentary about what has been acknowledged to be the worst film ever-made, Trolls 2, which has now become a cult classic. For folks like us who love lists, this is a must see.

• Agora - From as far as we can tell this is the story of whoever it was who burned all the books in Alexandria (Egypt, not Virginia) way back whenever and some lady who tried to stop them. As far as we know there may have been a papyrus version of People magazine - well, that's all conjecture. The lovely and talented Rachel Weisz stars in this one and given her previous role in the Mummy series this seems like a theme she's developing...

• South of the Border - Oliver Stone & Hugo Chavez; G.W. & Fox News must have really hated this movie - that's probably good reason to see it in itself. But it appears as though Oliver got a chance to talk with multiple South American presidents - giving us a unique perspective into what's happening south of the border.
  

• True Grit - What can we say, we like the Cohen Brothers and really admire Jeff Bridges (although sometimes, like in this year's Tron, he let us down a bit). A lot of people have tried to make comparisons between John Wayne's Rooster Cogburn and Jeff Bridge's character - well, we think the difference is simple - The Duke was always playing some variation of himself in his Westerns (which worked out pretty well), Jeff tends to explore his characters a bit more, become them - instead of the other way around. We're looking forward to seeing how this works out in the new True Grit. BTW - it looks as though both Josh Brolin and Matt Damon went the extra mile on this one too...
  

The Old West was full of bearded, one-eyed vigilante marshals who shot straight
and spoke funny - or so we've heard tell...

Never fear - we're not done with our lists yet - next one will be the top ten movies we watched last year but wish we hadn't...


Copyright 2010, Raving Reviews

Read More