1 - DW Griffith choosing to make the first real movie (The Birth of the Nation) an homage to the Klu Klux Klan - thus inventing all of this in one fell swoop:
- Propaganda films
- The Negative Ad
- 50 years of Hollywood Racial Stereotypes
- The license to rewrite History
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| The Klan at a Lynching party in The Birth of a Nation... |
2 - Madonna appearing as a fencing instructor in the Bond flick, Die Another Day. This scene has haunted us for years.
Never Say Madonna again
3 - Movie concession stand popcorn - Yuk, it's salty toxic waste w/ fake butter on top.
4 - Jerry Lewis, Pauly Shore, The Gipper...
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| We're told that this seems humorous in France... |
5 - Movie Critics - seriously, what the heck do we know?
6 - Ads in Theaters - We've got TV for that. Please make this go away.
7 - Ratings and Censors - It's not clear that these ever worked and we still haven't figured out what the difference between PG and PG-13 is.
8 - Credits that roll before the movie begins - Why do they deserve credit at that point?
9 - Flash-Backs with the same actor made to look ridiculously young - This is almost always embarrassing.
10 - Extreme Close Ups - no one deserves that - not the actors nor the audience.
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| Why does zooming in make something scarier? |
12 - Teen Musicals - from Mickey Rooney to High School Musical, the outcome is always likely to be the same.
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| Let's have a show! |
13 - The Floating Shot - A signature gimmick from director Spike Lee, we still don't get it.
14 - Blacklisting - not cool, really (and neither was Nixon).
15 - Jar Jar Binx - The racist animation that would have seemed at home in D.W. Griffiths, The Birth of a Nation.
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| Need we say more? |
16 - The Expendables - turning being a has-been into a marketing gimmick. Only Stallone could have thought of that.
17 - Just about anything from David Lynch.
18 - Swedish films in general.
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| Any wonder they picked this guy to play Ming the Merciless in Flash Gordon? |
19 - Caged women movies - Prison movies are peculiar genre; this offshoot focusing on women in prison is goofiest part of that genre.
20 - Adding "Drug Lord" anywhere in the synposis caption of the movie description. A recent survey of movies listed on Showtime and Encore channels showed 32% of the movies playing contained the the term "Drug Lord" in their description.
21 - The Celebrity Cameo - Feeding already over-inflated egos to the breaking point.
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| Mr. Fellini on a bad makeup day... |
22 - Fellini - Ok, we had to watch him in film appreciation 101 - but what the hell was this guy thinking?
23 - Product Placement - Maybe this was inevitable, but we don't have to like it.
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| What's worse than Wayne's World - this... |
24 - Bad Accents - Why can't Hollywood hire actors with the right language skills (or accents) for the role?
25 - British Accents for Romans, Nazis and Aliens - Why does everyone sound like they came out of a English boarding school? Why don't Romans sound Italian? It's just weird.
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