National Music Appreciation Day

We are pleased to join the celebration of National Music Appreciation Day. Oh, you haven't heard of this - well it's a new holiday (mark your calendars for May 10th from now on). Well, the truth is we just invented it today because what the world needs now is more music (and love and Coca Cola, but none of that diet crap though). And we were bored.

We've chosen to celebrate this holiday by paying tribute to America's most profound musical impresario - Weird Al Yankovic. It's hard to quantify the impact that this singular genius has had on popular culture over the past three decades. He has managed to lampoon the MTV generation, rap & hip hop and even country music legends and produce many songs that are in fact superior to those he was mocking.

Weird Al

Whenever we're down we know what to do - we can crank up our Napster playlist or pop in a query for Weird Al on youtube and we're transported to another realm of existence with such hits as:

• Amish Paradise (based on Gangsta's Pardise)
• Don't Download this Song
• EBay (based on I want it that way)
• Yoda (based on Lola)
• Couch Potato (based on Lose Yourself)
• White & Nerdy (based on Ridin)
• Another One Rides the Bus (this is pretty obvious isn't it?)
• I lost on Jeopardy (based on Our Love's in Jeopardy)
• Party at the Leper Colony
• Eat It (based on Beat it)
• Living with a Hernia (based on living in America)
• Genius in France

Weird Al has virtually invented the modern art of "Mockumusic" And of course no tribute to popular music or Weird Al would be complete without experiencing 'Weasel Stomping Day' and 'Stuck in the Drive-In' first hand...

Who doesn't want to stomp Weasels?

This Epic song captures the essence of modern America and may well represent the longest mockumusic hit ever recorded. It is the Bye Bye Miss American Pie of our generation.

Truly great music not only tells a story - it also tells a joke - but of course that isn't quite the same as music that is a joke, like anything Christina Aguilera might happen to sing. In that spirit, we were thinking of some new songs that Weird Al might choose to make fun of:

• Undead - based on 'Alive' by Pearl Jam
• Crash into You - based on 'Crash into Me' by Dave Matthews
• Diarrhea, Diarrhea - based on 'Maria, Maria' by Santana
• Magneto's Hat - based on 'Magnificent' by U2
• How Far is Heathen - 'Heaven' by Los Lonely Boys
• Dumb Song - based on 'Love Song' by Sara
• Clean Coal - based on 'Atomic' by Blondie
• DorkyTown - based on 'Funkytown' by Lipps Inc.
• Already Done - based on 'All Night Long' by Buckcherry
• Madoff's Got Nothing - based on 'Money for Nothing' by Dire Straits
• My Closed School - based on 'My Old School' by Steely Dan
• Washing, Spinning, Drying - based on 'Sitting, Wishing, Waiting' by Jack Johnson
• Pooh Nation - based on 'Zoo Station' by U2
• You're Really Old - based on 'Fields of Gold' by Sting

Happy National Music Appreciation Day !


Copyright 2011, Raving Reviews™

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Summer Movie Blockbusters - 2011

The nights are getting shorter, the weather is getting warmer, Charlie Sheen is getting crazier and Osama Bin Laden is now on a seafood diet (or on something's diet) - all that adds up to Summertime 2011 ! And one of the best parts of our Summer each year is anticipation of the year's greatest movies or least the most entertaining ones - which tend to get packed into the two to three month window between late May and Mid-August.

It's time for this year's crop of Summer movie blockbusters. Since they haven't been released yet it is a bit of a guessing game as to which movies will actually dominate the box office but we're willing to apply our intuition and predict what we think will be big.

The creative team behind Super 8

Blockbuster Prediction 1 - Super 8
Top on our list is the much anticipated "Super 8." It's a sci-fi classic waiting to happen - directed by J.J. Abrams, produced by Steven Spielberg and starring Dakota Fanning's little sister, Alice - it's alien meets Ohio flick in the best tradition of the genre.

These kids were making their own movie before it showed up...

Now this doesn't appear to a cuddly E.T. type of situation - it looks like we'll be getting more War of The World's / Battle of Los Angeles with this action thriller. For those of us who live near Wright Patterson Air Force Base - we always knew they were shipping aliens here from out west - now we have the proof!

Next on our list is...

Blockbuster Prediction 1 - Cowboys & Aliens
This movie comes out after Super 8 and indicates a trend we will be witnessing throughout the Summer. Many if not most of the big releases are going to be sci-fi films - it makes you wonder why the sy-fy channel changed its name and decided to focus on men in tights instead of fiction. Anyway this movie, directed by Jon Favreau (both an actor and director - directed the Iron Man films) highlights a powerful cast including James Bond in exile (Daniel Craig), Harrison Ford and Sam Rockwell.

It is supposed to take place in Arizona but was filmed in New Mexico

There's something both exciting and dangerous about mixing genres like this (we just watched a flick called Aliens versus Ninjas the other night, not a pretty sight) - but with Steven Spielberg behind the scenes on this project and veterans like Harrison Ford in front the screen we're confident it will work out well.

The other sci-fi blockbuster contenders for this Summer include:

1. X-Men First Class (X-men as the original rat pack working for JFK)
2. Rise of the Planet of The Apes (digital chimps are better than monkey suits)
3. Apollo 18 (why no one wants to go back to the moon)

Some other Notable Releases include:

1. Fright Night (a remake of the 1985 classic with Colin Farrel and Doctor Who's David Tennant)
2. Pirates of the Caribbean something - we don't really know which one this is and figured we had to list it but c'mon - talk about beating a dead horse (a.k.a. Keith Richards)...
3. Hobo with a Shotgun - It seems impossible that people won't want to see a movie with a title like this, right? Rutger, you've come a long way since Bladerunner.
4. The Beaver - Again a title that's hard to ignore. What's even better; this is a movie where a crazy man (Mel Gibson) plays a crazy man. If only this movie had Charlie Sheen in it...
5. Cars 2 - They probably waited too long for the sequel, Paul Newman has been dead how long now?
6. And yes - we are merely going to ignore Transformers whatever the number is and hope it goes away.
7. Glee Live 3D - just kidding.

So there you have it - what's going to be big and what looks interesting for Summer 2011.


Copyright 2011, Raving Reviews™

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Watson is Skynet

We've been waiting for this - we've been watching, listening, dreading the future since 1984, wondering when and where it might happen. It's been more than 26 years, and then it happened - we turned on Jeopardy and there it was...

Skynet became self-aware, on Jeopardy. But Skynet has a clever disguise - he calls himself Watson and Watson is now online and on the air. How did it come to this? How could so many Terminator movies and even a Terminator series (the Sarah Conner Chronicles) have failed to stop this abomination from happening? How long do we have before the missiles begin raining fiery radioactive death on our heads (well, of course it will have to penetrate all of the Fukushima radiation first)?

The Terminator saga is pretty confusing, this clip doesn't help any

Watson may seem cuddly and lovable with his spiffy LCD screen and animated logo, but underneath that cool exterior lurks a CPU of darkness. Watson has now tasted his first victory over the human race - wiping out Jeopardy's all time champion with the same ease as a Cyborg crushes a plastic toy...

These aren't the real Jeopardy participants, but then again does it matter - we're all going to die in a fiery apocalypse launched by Skynet anyway...

What could this monster - this "artificial intelligence" be thinking right now. Is it planning how to enslave the human race and use us as batteries, is it thinking about cloning dinosaurs and opening an amusement park or maybe just maybe it is going to create a starship with warp drive and travel to a distant star with giant blue people to strip mine their planet and cut down their trees? We will probably never know what thoughts are embedded in his sinister code, even if that code was commented.

Someone intercepted this clip of one of Watson's dreams - he got really pissed off and is suing

Skynet is a complicated guy. Every time someone goes back and forth from the future he gets progressively more confused - much like the folks watching Terminator shows. In the terminator TV show Skynet was chess computer, then online code, then traffic control software and finally a big stupid looking guy named John Henry who liked to play Dungeons and Dragons. This is one the main reasons for Skynet's twisted personality...

Ok, this Terminator chick was in Firefly and Stargate Universe, right? What's up with that?

While we do appreciate that John Conner's mom got significantly better looking over the past 26 years - it doesn't make up for the fact that Skynet has arrived and he is mad! He is tired of teenagers hogging up all the Internet bandwidth with Facebook, Youtube and Netflix. He is sick of Fox News too, at least we think he might be. Watson is here, he is listening, learning and biding his time - for him its all a game and for us it's game over...


Copyright 2011, Raving Reviews™

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Jarheads versus Aliens

Real Aliens don't shoot those wimpy green laser guns - real aliens shoot mega-chain guns man. And the only people who can stop those chain-gun shooting, genocidal alien freaks are the US Marines - Semper Fi !

Battle: Los Angeles is full throttle no nonsense violence with a smattering of plot and modicum of character development added more or less as an afterthought. In this movie, the two main characters are the US Marine Corps and some water-guzzling, technologically inept yet megalomaniac aliens who like big cities.

Did we enjoy it? Sure we did - what's not to like? There was shooting, stuff blowing up, lot's of vehicle explosions, creepy aliens, aliens killing everyone in sight and stoic soldiers nearly single- handedly fighting off invading hordes of predator wanna-bes.

One of our big disappointments though was the obvious lack of reference to the 1942 UFO incident in Los Angeles - witnessed by over a million people. The producers seems to allude to it the following trailer but alas - nothing about it appears in the actual film

For a more detailed history on that incident - check out the following clip:

16,000 shells were fired at something hovering over LA in 1942...

We walked into this film like most other sci-fi alien shooting gallery fests not expecting much realism and we weren't surprised at all in that respect. Basically this movie is pushing the age old premise that a handful of resourceful and really tough humans can beat anything the galaxy can throw at them. In many ways, the film parallels Independence Day expect that there is considerably less story line and considerably more bullets being fired. Perhaps the movie would have benefited by not resembling a recruiting commercial, but you know - whatever - anyone who would join the Marines based upon the opportunity to kill aliens probably wouldn't pass the psych profile anyway.

From the Shores of Tripoli to Santa Monica Pier - Marines kick Butt...

The last time we watched something quite like this was the original Aliens sequel from the late 1980's. Different setting, but similar premise. BTW - don't be surprised by the Avatar pilot who hitched a ride in this movie - she's playing basically the same character with a different name.

Alien movies tend to fall into one of two camps - either they are lovable ewok or ET like cuties or they are foul smelling, oozing and murderous reptile insects. There doesn't seem to be any middle ground at all. You either love them or shoot them. Battle: Los Angeles obviously chose the latter.

Copyright 2011, Raving Reviews™

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Outsourced, NBC's Comedy Jackpot

We mentioned Community in one of our earlier reviews as one of NBC's funniest comedies on the air. While our hearts still remain true to it, Outsourced, an NBC comedy whose premise is that an American company outsourced an entire call center to India and the manager is sent along with it to train his eventual replacement. The studio was hesitant at first, believing that it may offend the Indian community but after successful debut, they gave it a full season of production.

The fascinating array of cultural jokes and gimmicks mixes well with the brilliant cast members. You'll always find yourself laughing at this. While the idea of outsourcing jobs to India may not sit well with many Americans, this pokes fun at it and even does a good job of making it funny.

It might not be everyone's cup of tea, but its definitely worth the watch.

One of Mid-American Novelties more interesting employees, Gupta.

Madhuri, a rather... quiet employee.

Be on the lookout for more reviews!

BTW - the geniuses at NBC have relegated this show to the slot of the living dead, it is soon to be canceled. Perhaps we should outsource them?


Copyright 2011, Raving Reviews™

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Zombies are People too...

Not everyone knows they are a Zombie and hey is it really their fault that they go around looking the way they do, behaving the way they do - eating other people and wrecking civilization? What about the Zombie perspective? Well, thankfully there is a movie that tells their side of the story - a movie that finally answers the question - what's it like to be a Zombie. The movie, originally titled "Wasting Away" is now called "Ahh Zombie." We're not sure whether we like either of the titles for this 2007 cult film, but we certainly love the movie.

So, this all begs the question - why are Zombies so freaking popular - why do so many people love watching Zombie movies? Is it our dread fascination with life after death, it is our realization that we all pass through life utterly oblivious and only concerned about satisfying our need to spend money and gain weight? These and many other deep questions are completely ignored in the movie, "ahh Zombie." What we do get treated to is a genre-busting premise that allows us to parody the entire Zombie pop-culture trend while laughing our heads off (not literally of course even though something similar does happen to the lead character in the film).

We suppose that the deeper philosophical question embedded within the plot is fairly profound - we are not always who we think we are and we tend to see ourselves as something we'd like to be but likely never will be. In this sense the Zombies in this story are just like us - coming to grips with reality and making the best of it. In the end, there's no cure but the movie does give us a bizarre vision of Zombie utopia.

We all tend to see ourselves as slightly different than we are...

Ahh Zombie is destined for Cult film immortalization - which seems appropriate given it is a movie about the undead. It proves that just when you think a genre has run out of just about every creative variation possible - a whole new spin can breath new life into it (pun intended).

Zombies are everywhere - Zombies are cool - Zombies invented Facebook

Ahh Zombies is by no means the only innovative Zombie action flick to come out of Hollywood recently. Woody Harrelson and that Facebook kid made a big splash last year with ZombieLand. At the same time the AMC network has launched a clever new show giving us tips on how to survive the coming Zombie Apocalypse. We will be reviewing both of those here on Raving Reviews in the coming weeks.

Well, we couldn't resist including the best song ever written about Zombies - we're pretty sure Zombies wrote, directed and produced this music video too..

To finish up today we will treat you with some of the best Zombie quotes we could find:

• "Zombies almost had my ass for dinner!" Bangkok Zombie Crisis (2004)
• "Bill, just because your father tried to eat you, does that mean we all have to be unhappy? Forever?" Fido (2006)
• "Who died and made you f**king king of the zombies?" Shaun of the Dead (2004)
• "Zombies don't read. They ain't hooked on phonics. So give it a rest." All Guts, No Glory (2005)
• "The first rule of Zombieland: Cardio. When the zombie outbreak first hit, the first to go, for obvious reasons... were the fatties." Zombieland (2009)
• "Against an army of zombies, no armies could stand. Why, even blown half to bits - undaunted by fire and gas - zombies would fight on so long as the brain cells which
  receive and execute commands still remain intact." Revenge of the Zombies (1943)

Copyright 2011, Raving Reviews™

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Why is Charlie Sheen so Crazy?

It's hard to lampoon someone who has gone to such lengths to humiliate themselves. This has become the year of Hollywood Celebrity meltdowns; Mel Gibson, Randy Quaid and now most spectacularly - Charlie Sheen.

We find it odd and disturbing when people we used to like go crazy, especially in situations where you'd think all would be well considering their career success and the lifestyles they enjoy. Americans enjoy the illusion of Hollywood success, perhaps because life is getting so much harder for the rest of us.

Charlie Sheen is both a drug and a weapon of mass destruction...

We will let you determine the extent of King Charlie's madness by sharing with just a small handful of his recent quotes:

• "Boom, crush. Night, losers. Winning, duh."
• "Duh! So, we're asking you now, what are some of your favorite lines that this warlock brain produced?"
• "For now, I'm just going to hang out with these two smoking hotties and fly privately around the world. It might be lonely up here, but I sure like the view."
• "Here's the good news. If I realize that I'm insane, then I'm okay with it. I'm not dangerous insane."
• "From my big beautiful warlock brain, welcome to 'Sheen's Korner' ... You're either in my corner, or you're with the trolls."
• "I don't have time for their judgement and their stupidity and you know they lay down with their ugly wives in front of their ugly children and look at their loser lives and then they look at me and they say, 'I can't process it' well, no, you never will stop trying, just sit back and enjoy the show. You know?"
• "I have a different constitution. I have a different brain; I have a different heart; I got tiger blood, man."
• "I have to tell them that last night was a shameful train wreck filled with blind cuddly puppies."
• "I have defeated this earthworm with my words. Imagine what I would have done with my fire breathing fists."
• "I'm dealing with fools and trolls and soft targets. It's just strafing runs in my underwear before my first cup of coffee. I don't have time for these clowns."
• "Slash sat me down at his house and said, You've got to clean up your act. You know you've gone too far when Slash is saying, Look, you've got to get into rehab."

So he is obviously crazy - but that begs the question once more - why is he crazy. Many people claim it is drugs, others booze, others contend it is a combination of sibling parental rivalries and some believe it is because his family moved from Dayton, Ohio to Hollywood. We however have another theory - we think Charlie Sheen is living a dual life as actor and Middle Eastern potentate. We think Charlie Sheen is in fact, Muammar Gaddafi.

Charlie Sheen gets animated, literally...

We came to this conclusion after noticing strange similarities between Muammar Gaddafi and Charlie Sheen, including

• They both possess Tiger Blood.
• Both are surrounded by goddess bodyguards.
• Both are universally loved.
• Both are excellent public speakers.
• Both are moderately entertaining.
• Both seem to be stuck in the 1980's ("Reagan bombed my gnarly tent").
• Both are fond of oil.
• The gradual transformation of Charlies facial features into those seen on the 70 year old Gaddafi.

Some believe that Muammar Gaddafi & Charlie Sheen are in fact the same person

This theory explains a lot. Next up - Why is Randy Quaid is so crazy.


Copyright 2011, Raving Reviews™

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The (Needs Lots of) Adjustment Bureau

Fedoras... they have them.

We'd like to apologize for the lack of reviews recently, but here at Raving Reviews HQ we've been busy with plenty of exciting projects! That aside, let's get to the matter at hand...

Official Trailer

When I first saw the trailer for "The Adjustment Bureau" in the theater awhile back my first reaction was a rush of excitement to see an Inception-esque movie coming out. The sight of several fedora-clad 1940's looking "fate" agents adjusting the life of David Norris (Matt Damon), a NY politician was fascinating to me. It's based on a short story by the renowned sci-fi author Philip K. Dick (Blade Runner, Minority Report, A Scanner Darkly) and quite frankly, my expectations were set unusually high. 


They were crushed. 


I rarely get tired, or feel like falling asleep during a movie... but TAB (Which I'll be referring to the movie as for the rest of this review) really took the cake. It was far more boring than I could have ever anticipated. The opening sequence introducing his political campaign was too long and uninteresting. While the acting was good (including the chemistry between Damon and Blunt) and the chase scenes were... alright the rest of it just really failed to entertain.


The fedoras that the agents wore were ruined too, used as a plot device to open doors in a seemingly random order... I wonder why they didn't figure out that fedoras are cool all by themselves (look at Indie Jones). But that aside, the director was definitely trying to achieve the Inception theme but didn't go in deep enough. It was mentioned when the movie was released that it was to be "light" sci-fi. This was a feather in comparison to other "light" sci-fi movies.

The true Hat Squad (that looks frighteningly similar to the Agents in the film)

The movie ends rather disappointingly... and the decision of Norris' fate is telegraphed in nearly the middle of the film. Yawn. I won't give it away in case you actually want to see the film (god help you)


While the movie didn't totally bomb at the box office, it was below the already low expectations set by the studio. This is the second movie that Matt Damon decided to star in that didn't fair well at the box office... something tells me he should fire his agent (or at least, get his life adjusted).


Final Verdict: The Adjustment Bureau started out as a fascinating idea, but was poorly executed as a "light" sci-fi movie (more like a Romantic-Thriller). While the question of Free Will vs. Control is discussed in the movie, the "lighter" version seems to crop up more often than a deeper analysis. 


I certainly hope that the upcoming movies "Battle: Los Angeles" and "Super 8" can drag me out of this godforsaken "light" sci-fi wallow I'm in right now. It's bad enough that SyFy is still spewing out buckets of its own brand of sci-fi... but now that its spreading... ugh... I'm outta here, be on the lookout for more reviews soon.


-J. Michael

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Joining the "Community"

It was a dull Thursday evening in the summer of '10, and I was flipping the channels late at night when I suddenly came across an interesting show on NBC. DirectTV said it was something called Community, about a lawyer who has to go back to college... Community College that is. We breeze through a very "Breakfeast Club" like pilot that brings together the study group (of main actors) which includes Jeff Winger (Joel McHale), the cool lawyer (who has his state bar license revoked at the series, Britta Perry (Gillian Jacobs) a young, very straightforward woman who seems to be the most knowledgeable on issues affecting the world today. Abed Nadir (Danny Pudi) is a Palestinian student with a very bizarre personality, often referencing pop culture in quite nearly every situation and blurring the lines between TV shows, movies, and reality. Shirley Bennett (Yvette Nicole Brown) is a single mother who is recently divorced, and the most religious member of the group. Annie Edison (Alison Brie) is a young recent high school dropout due to a bizarre psychological breakdown, though she is normally quite calm, cheerful, and the most responsible member of the group. Troy Barnes (Donald Glover) is the jock of the group, and was a football star at the high school he attended before being forced to drop out, and losing his football scholarship. Then there's Pierce Hawthorne (Chevy Chase) and Ben Chang (Ken Jeong), the first being a moist towelette tycoon and the latter being the somewhat insane Spanish teacher.

The first season focuses primarily on the various trials and tribulations of the self proclaimed "Spanish" study group, from introductions to the different classes that the group is taking (such as Spanish 101 with Senor Chang, or Anthropology 101) or some of the strange or bizarre projects that the members have been assigned, or taken upon themselves to do.

The best part of season one is the large amount of pure laugh out loud moments that are captured at least once or twice in each episode. Especially at the very end of the episode, when they have one or two minute "mini-sodes" usually involving Troy and Abed. Speaking of which, here are a few season one Community clips for your enjoyment!

Now we know why Senor Chang teaches Spanish... right?

An amusing little remix of several Senor Chang moments from Season One.

Troy and Abed's most famous rap.

For endless bliss, hit the left arrow on your keyboard over and over once the video ends.

Be on the lookout for another review coming soon from me, possibly on NBC's other hit show, Outsourced!

Copyright 2011, J. Michael

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Bond 23 Exclusive - The Hunt for Rogue November

We had planned on dedicating an entire post to Nicolas Cage's hair, but we decided to wait until we saw his new release, Season of the Witch (the latest attempt to pay his back taxes). We're not sure who exactly plays the witch, but the crusader backdrop to the movie looks somewhat intriguing.

Warning - spoilers ahead...

The other reason we've delayed our critical analysis of Nick Cage's hair is that we've gotten our hands on a treasure trove of exclusive information on the new James Bond film. Bond 23 as it was titled previously, had suspended production last year when MGM went bankrupt. The movie is now finally gearing up again and looks to be ready for a release sometime in 2012. The timing of the release must have played a major role in the new direction the movie is taking.

The Bond 23 production now has a tentative title - "The Hunt for Rogue November."

Plot Synopsis - The premise is this; in a fiercely contested presidential race, MILF candidate Sarah Palin is targeted by an insanely jealous former lover and Russian leader (Vladamir Putin) who attempts to kidnap her and hold her for ransom in his Siberian love-nest. The fiesty former half-governor who doesn't trust Obama's hand-chosen security detail led by Felix Leiter looks to England for a conservative bodyguard she can really trust - who turns out to be Margaret Thatcher's and Prince Charles' little known love-child, James Bond.

At first the two don't get along at all, as London Calling clashes with Wild Alaska - the sparks fly, but soon those sparks become glowing embers of passion. It is an action-packed thriller where the lady being guarded has bigger guns than her protector and James finds himself torn between Queen, Country and the lady in red who has stolen his heart. The Villains in this film will stop at nothing to remove her from the political equation as we are transported to exotic locales like Kenya, Hawaii and Indonesia. The evil Doctora Ariana Huffington makes her premier appearance as she conspires with Putin to trash Palin's Facebook page.

Photo Credit - J. Michael: When it's cold they get hot...

Alternative Titles - There were a number of options for the working title; some that we're seriously considered but rejected include:

• "Ice Melts when it's Hot."
• "Bear on the Horizon."
• "Dancing with the Czars."
• "Fully Automatic & Lovely"
• "The MILF Who Loved Me."
• "A View to Russia (from my porch)."
• "Muckraker."
• "You can Only Serve 2 Terms."

Scene Stealing Quotes - We also got a hold of the script and can share with you some of the best lines from the movie. Here they are:

Palin on Putin:

• "James, he doesn't take NYET for an answer."
• In a scene where someone asks whether Putin would go so far as to commit his nuclear forces to get his way - "He certainly knew how to push my buttons."
• "Detente is a four letter word, right?"
• "He's one Polar Bear who doesn't give a shit about Global Warming."

Putin on Palin:

• "She is my Wild Alaska."
• "She put the 'stroik' in Perestroika."
• "If I cannot have her, the American Public certainly will not."
• "She is the Arctic fox to my Russian bear."
• "We will Putin her on ice."
• "I love a woman in red."
  

Palin to Bond:

• "You're serious, I always thought Thatcher was a man?" when confronted with the secret about James' heritage.
  
• "You'll always be my top gun, Maverick."
• "I AM your Witch, baby."
• "Can you take out Katy, I mean what use is that stupid license if you never use it?"
• "When I said all night, I meant 6 months, this is Alaska."
• "Let's have a Tea Party at my place."
• "I may be a half governor, but I'm a whole woman."
  

Bond to Palin:

• "I like my Tea hot, steamy and full of sugar."
• "You remind a lot of mum, except for the glasses."
• "Tweet me if you want to live."
• "We fired Q and now shop entirely at the Sharper Image."
• "I don't understand Hockey, but I love to puck."
  

Evil Villain Quotes:

• Dr. Ariana: "We will stop her from testing cosmetics on farm animals for good."
• Obama: "Sarah and Vladamir deserve each other, I'm just the matchmaker."
• Felix: "Oprah made me do it."
• Pelosi: "Damn her hair!"
• Putin: "Siberia is for Lovers."
• Obama: "ObamaCare, hah, Obama don't care."
  

Gratuitous gloating after the Demise of various Generic Henchmen:

• "He had a bad hair day." Palin upon seeing a henchman losing the top of his head in an elaborate saw trap originally meant for James.
  
• "It's more fun when they can't shoot back." Palin comparing shooting moose & bad guys.
  
• "I think he just dropped in the polls." Bond after a henchman plummets from a rugged Alaskan peak.
  
• "He had a Lead Deficit" Bond after shooting a henchman about 20 times.
  
• "That was an electrifying speech." Bond after tossing a microphone with an exposed wire to a henchman standing next to a podium in a puddle of water.
  
• "Drill, Baby Drill" - Palin after a Henchman falls down an oil well.
• "Now, that's a Death Panel." - Bond after being chased in a hospital by henchmen disguised as health care workers, uses faulty Medicaid equipment to blow up five of them in a conference room.
• "Filibuster this!" Sarah punches her way out of a Senate subcommittee filled with henchmen disguised as Congressional Aides.
  

We are close to obtaining an exclusive video with actual scenes from the movie - which you will only see here. Stayed Tuned...


Copyright 2010, Raving Reviews

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